14 posts tagged “knitting”
to your right, or maybe left, probably supposed to be left but pretty much is your right.. my new favorite people. mates of state just completely took my soul. i love them so so much. they are just so adorable and happy and their music completely reflects it. their music makes me so happy at time when i'm not, and right now would've been one of those times. they're new album just increases my already increasing love for them. i love when i can profess my love for a band because they change my world and my mind. sigur ros is also one of those bands, and they're my absolute favorite right now, no contest. they introduced me to the lovely and majesty that is the country of iceland. i want to be there. i want to experience it. i want it. i want, i want, i want.
so i did have my ap test today, which means, freedom for type once again ! the multiple choice was okay. i left five blank and i was unsure about a few, but i think i did pretty okay. i hope i did pretty okay. the essays were a bust. my dbq seemed like a masterpiece while i was writing it, but after i thought about it, i might have misinterpreted some documents. the change over time essay, i bullshitted my way through. i thought it was really bad, it probably was. i'd say what it was on, but i'm not allowed to for 48 hours. ;) hehe. my comparative essay was okay, seemed okay, until the last ten minutes when i noticed that i wrote about the wrong time period and i should've picked the easier of them ! last ten minutes. i was thinking, ugh ugh ugh. i hope i didn't get a 2. i want the 3 ! at least a 3 ! i'd be happy there. a 4 would make my life at this point. i should've studied more, but i'm not stressing about it so much. i'd rather live a life having to take another history course than make myself feel worse for a second. i'm going to go eat some cold pizza and do homework, chill. i feel like watching eternal sunshineeeee ! so i might just do that. i also feel like making a sweater... i wonder if i could ! my first sweater would probably come out terrible disproportional, but oh well, it's worth a good old shot i suppose. i'm not suree, but i still have homeworkz to do !
so i did have my ap test today, which means, freedom for type once again ! the multiple choice was okay. i left five blank and i was unsure about a few, but i think i did pretty okay. i hope i did pretty okay. the essays were a bust. my dbq seemed like a masterpiece while i was writing it, but after i thought about it, i might have misinterpreted some documents. the change over time essay, i bullshitted my way through. i thought it was really bad, it probably was. i'd say what it was on, but i'm not allowed to for 48 hours. ;) hehe. my comparative essay was okay, seemed okay, until the last ten minutes when i noticed that i wrote about the wrong time period and i should've picked the easier of them ! last ten minutes. i was thinking, ugh ugh ugh. i hope i didn't get a 2. i want the 3 ! at least a 3 ! i'd be happy there. a 4 would make my life at this point. i should've studied more, but i'm not stressing about it so much. i'd rather live a life having to take another history course than make myself feel worse for a second. i'm going to go eat some cold pizza and do homework, chill. i feel like watching eternal sunshineeeee ! so i might just do that. i also feel like making a sweater... i wonder if i could ! my first sweater would probably come out terrible disproportional, but oh well, it's worth a good old shot i suppose. i'm not suree, but i still have homeworkz to do !
today is one of those days where absolutely nothing goes as planned. everything feels like a mess and i feel like i've been let down, even though i'm always afraid to admit it. i had plans with my friend today that were canceled. not the first time, but i just hate when i plan things and they go to waste. another one of my friends even asked me to chill today but i said i couldn't cos i was hanging out with the other friend. so now i'm left with no plans, feeling shitty, and everything just keeps piling up. the highlight of my day was a beautiful film called amelie, which i'll probably watch again. but it did bring me a rude awakening, that explaining the complexities and strange characteristics of your characters through a narration, which i've seen in films of wes anderson and juno, is becoming a new indie filmmaking fad. i, at first, planned to use this often, but now that i see how often it is being used in the film world today, i think i better stray from it. let people figure out my complex characters for themselves through their oddities and eyes. i guess some good can come out of slow days. i guess i'll just work out more.
don't you hate it when you work hard and nothing comes quickly? i know i do. i wish everything would just come faster. you wait for things, work for things, and things just remain things. that's why it's so hard to achieve goals. prices rise every year, you grow stronger or weaker every minute. every time you think you have the ability to doubt or support, and it pretty much sucks when you have so much time on your hands, like i do today. you doubt what your niche is, you doubt your career choice, you doubt your friends and doubt life itself. that's what i hate sometimes. i fear that maybe my current friends may become like the friends i left. the friends i left because they were unreliable, and didn't really care enough about me as i would've liked. people are shallow most of the time. people like for you to come to their house, rather than they come to yours. people like to spend your money rather than their own, and people would much rather have a pretty friend than an ugly friend, unless of course they were only friends with the ugly one so when they stroll down the school corridors together, the onlookers would think 'jeez, that one is hot, cos the other one is hideous !' sometimes i wonder why some of my friends are friends with me. do they really care or do they just like me for silly reasons i can't explain? etsy sales have been terribly slow this month. i don't know if i've wronged myself in some way, or i just stopped caring. i don't think it's the second one, but maybe it's been my lack of treasuries, even though i'm on the front page of etsy's 'gag gift' gift guide. sometimes etsy hearts annoy me because they can mean three things. i want to add your to my treasury, i want to buy you, or the dreaded third option, it's cool, but i wouldn't buy it. i feel as though i've been knitting all week. i feel like a grandma of sorts ! i feel like everything is just rushing around me. i'm tired of the rush. i want to just be. i always have to remind myself that no one is perfect in high school, but it's just annoying when everyone is so deceiving.
don't you hate it when you work hard and nothing comes quickly? i know i do. i wish everything would just come faster. you wait for things, work for things, and things just remain things. that's why it's so hard to achieve goals. prices rise every year, you grow stronger or weaker every minute. every time you think you have the ability to doubt or support, and it pretty much sucks when you have so much time on your hands, like i do today. you doubt what your niche is, you doubt your career choice, you doubt your friends and doubt life itself. that's what i hate sometimes. i fear that maybe my current friends may become like the friends i left. the friends i left because they were unreliable, and didn't really care enough about me as i would've liked. people are shallow most of the time. people like for you to come to their house, rather than they come to yours. people like to spend your money rather than their own, and people would much rather have a pretty friend than an ugly friend, unless of course they were only friends with the ugly one so when they stroll down the school corridors together, the onlookers would think 'jeez, that one is hot, cos the other one is hideous !' sometimes i wonder why some of my friends are friends with me. do they really care or do they just like me for silly reasons i can't explain? etsy sales have been terribly slow this month. i don't know if i've wronged myself in some way, or i just stopped caring. i don't think it's the second one, but maybe it's been my lack of treasuries, even though i'm on the front page of etsy's 'gag gift' gift guide. sometimes etsy hearts annoy me because they can mean three things. i want to add your to my treasury, i want to buy you, or the dreaded third option, it's cool, but i wouldn't buy it. i feel as though i've been knitting all week. i feel like a grandma of sorts ! i feel like everything is just rushing around me. i'm tired of the rush. i want to just be. i always have to remind myself that no one is perfect in high school, but it's just annoying when everyone is so deceiving.
<-- sage knit purse, $9.75 my first purse ever ! available now in my etsy shop ! just so you guys know, lately i've been trying really hard not to put any of my prices in the double digits. this is probably the closest i'll get, for now. until i find my niche, or something constant, i'll just be messing around here and there i suppose. i'm really desperate to find that one thing that i enjoy making, that i can keep making. i love knitting and i love sewing.. but it's just hard to find that one thing you were pretty much meant to make. i just feel so messy after reading one of the featured seller's advice about finding one thing to sell and keep constant, and about how a lot of people become unsuccessful because they like to dab into all these different things. i was just visualizing a television channel, dabbing into different things. i mean, it's like a channel that would show a child's cartoon one second, then a game show, then a sitcom, then a crime drama, then a reality show, then porn or something ! it's like, a mess ! so now i feel messy. i don't know if it's a rational fear or completely irrational but i feel totally lost right now concerning the state of my etsy shop ! but speaking of lost, lost is finally back tonight ! and i'm so incredibly super excited cos ugly betty is back also ! tonight is going to rock ! i'm going to knit and watch my two favorite shows ! yeah, i'm lame, but simple things amuse me. ^_^
for some reason i felt the urge to post very early today. i don't know exactly why i need to post in the beginning of the day, but i suppose there is some reason for it, and i don't really care what it is, so yeah, here i am ! i guess i feel like i should accomplish a lot today? yeah, maybe that is it ! have you ever felt that feeling? like your idols are starting to lose their appeal, and like the world around you is crumbling beside you, like that coffee cake you can never quite put your fork on.. but once you take a bite of it, you realize maybe you shouldn't be eating that because you're trying to lose your muffin top, so you then run to your room, only to just keep getting hungrier, thinking of how good those crumbly pieces would taste in your mouth, so you go back and eat it, only to be disappointed in yourself that you did. that's not me anymore, but some of my idols are losing their appeal. maybe i should find new idols. i have my idol of mind, idol of body and then a various amount of free idols.
i had a long talk with my dad and my sister last night. it was about the peace corps. my dad was in the peace corps in the seventies, so since he knows i want to do it, whenever something about it vaguely comes up, he uses it as an excuse to tell me not to go to africa. my sister says, don't go to south america, because she has a huge grudge against hispanics, with reason though. the two continents i'd like to go to, actually, are south america and africa. what a coincidence, hm? at first i was set on going to peru on the peace corps, because i felt like i owed it to them. one of their own, even if not the brightest, gave me life, and i've been surrounded by so many negative peruvians that my sister has lost faith in the country as a whole, completely. because of this, i wanted to go to peru and repay my debts to them and give them help and aid and teach them whatever i can. then, came africa. i had absolutely no thought in going to africa until i saw 'peaceful warrior,' and nothing stuck in my head more, from the book or the film, than that one quote. "the hardest people to love are the ones who need it most." and then i thought, i should go to africa despite what my father says. i will probably have no other opportunity in my life to go there, so why not go there, hm? my dad is scared of the aids, of course, but i feel like i need to go there, like something is making me lean towards them, and i want to go. i suppose kenya or south africa would be sufficient, but who knows where everything will be politically by the time it's my chance. all i know is, i want to go to the peace corps in africa or south america.
so i have a lot of goals for today only. maybe it'd be nice to, since i have these days off, make goals in the morning so then i can live on the new day with meaning. so my goals for today are:
- finish the knitted purse i've been working on
- finish balzac & the little chinese seamstress
- do the yoga & the richard simmons videos i took out from the library
- write three essays for AP test practice, or go over unit 1 completely
and i suppose that's it. it's pretty much going to be a busy day in my own head, and although it's not a goal, i'd like to watch 300 tonight. i got it from the library, and i've been dying to see it with it's amazing cinematography, so i shall !
i had a long talk with my dad and my sister last night. it was about the peace corps. my dad was in the peace corps in the seventies, so since he knows i want to do it, whenever something about it vaguely comes up, he uses it as an excuse to tell me not to go to africa. my sister says, don't go to south america, because she has a huge grudge against hispanics, with reason though. the two continents i'd like to go to, actually, are south america and africa. what a coincidence, hm? at first i was set on going to peru on the peace corps, because i felt like i owed it to them. one of their own, even if not the brightest, gave me life, and i've been surrounded by so many negative peruvians that my sister has lost faith in the country as a whole, completely. because of this, i wanted to go to peru and repay my debts to them and give them help and aid and teach them whatever i can. then, came africa. i had absolutely no thought in going to africa until i saw 'peaceful warrior,' and nothing stuck in my head more, from the book or the film, than that one quote. "the hardest people to love are the ones who need it most." and then i thought, i should go to africa despite what my father says. i will probably have no other opportunity in my life to go there, so why not go there, hm? my dad is scared of the aids, of course, but i feel like i need to go there, like something is making me lean towards them, and i want to go. i suppose kenya or south africa would be sufficient, but who knows where everything will be politically by the time it's my chance. all i know is, i want to go to the peace corps in africa or south america.
so i have a lot of goals for today only. maybe it'd be nice to, since i have these days off, make goals in the morning so then i can live on the new day with meaning. so my goals for today are:
- finish the knitted purse i've been working on
- finish balzac & the little chinese seamstress
- do the yoga & the richard simmons videos i took out from the library
- write three essays for AP test practice, or go over unit 1 completely
and i suppose that's it. it's pretty much going to be a busy day in my own head, and although it's not a goal, i'd like to watch 300 tonight. i got it from the library, and i've been dying to see it with it's amazing cinematography, so i shall !
<-- bubblegum knit zipper pouch, $7.25. available at my etsy shop ! today has been pretty slow. i haven't loved it that much. i've been knitting a lot. i'm starting on a sage echarpe, since i haven't had one before. it sort of sucks summer is ending. i won't be able to get away with scarves and scarflettes, since they'll be a lot harder to sell in the warm weather. as of right now i'm still contemplating what to do. i'll probably come out with more jewelry, squees and such. i'll probably also introduces more choices in terms of mustaches and will make brooches and maybe even attempt a little on clothes. i'm learning to knit a lot more, but my major goal is to start knitting boots, for women, not just babies. i saw these amazing boots on urban outfitters' website and they had this sort of knitted look to them, so it made me wonder, had they been knitted? i figure, i can knit with plastic bags for the bottom to make them extra sturdy and then knit with normal yarn the way through. it sounds good to me. i'll probably attempt making them for myself first though, just to see if it actually works out. it'll probably be my most time consuming project; but i'm also looking to make hats and stuff, and more geometric type items. maybe i'll graduate to sweaters soon even.
today was just too bland, even for me. too much time on my hands, and i guess it kind of hurts. i guess i feel the need to spend my day doing something really worthwhile. i don't know how i went from feeling almost confident, to completely not confident. feelings fluctuate so much sometimes i don't even notice them passing by. i'm so tired of feeling the way i do about myself. i feel like i should spend more on making me become who i want to be inside and out. maybe i'm right, maybe i'm wrong, but i guess this year i really should try and focus on bettering myself rather than bettering other people. i've been watching that new show on tlc every week, 'i can make you thin.' i think next month, along with my exercise, i'm going to try to eat by his rules. i think the first step in bettering myself, is truly how i look at my body. my internal flaws, i've been working on a lot more recently, but next month is about physical appearance. but i'm going to follow the advice of paul mckenna and compare me to me, rather than to stupid celebrities or something. i just want a flatter stomach and skinnier arms. i don't have that many problems with much else. it all probably sounds really shallow, but i know sooner or later my physical appearance will bug me again, and why not start maintaining it while what i want is in reach? my vegan for a month went fine, i have confidence that this will as well.
today was just too bland, even for me. too much time on my hands, and i guess it kind of hurts. i guess i feel the need to spend my day doing something really worthwhile. i don't know how i went from feeling almost confident, to completely not confident. feelings fluctuate so much sometimes i don't even notice them passing by. i'm so tired of feeling the way i do about myself. i feel like i should spend more on making me become who i want to be inside and out. maybe i'm right, maybe i'm wrong, but i guess this year i really should try and focus on bettering myself rather than bettering other people. i've been watching that new show on tlc every week, 'i can make you thin.' i think next month, along with my exercise, i'm going to try to eat by his rules. i think the first step in bettering myself, is truly how i look at my body. my internal flaws, i've been working on a lot more recently, but next month is about physical appearance. but i'm going to follow the advice of paul mckenna and compare me to me, rather than to stupid celebrities or something. i just want a flatter stomach and skinnier arms. i don't have that many problems with much else. it all probably sounds really shallow, but i know sooner or later my physical appearance will bug me again, and why not start maintaining it while what i want is in reach? my vegan for a month went fine, i have confidence that this will as well.
<--bubblegum cell phone/iPod cozy, $5. now available in my etsy shop ! today was a fairly slow day. i finally watched Once. it was as i expected, and more. i really liked it a lot. i'd recommend it to almost anyone, as long as you're okay with good music and a little romanticism, but not too much. it was a sweet love story; not the soft-core porn type most people are used to in movies today. as of right now, i'm not entirely sure what type of films i will make, but i want films with meaning and amazing cinematography, rather than movies bordering on pornography. the problem is there is hardly a border anymore of what film can and can't show. i like it that way, but it makes some films so hard to get. sometimes i can't take a film completely seriously just cos it has a leetle too much love in it. i'm not a weenie or a prude or anything, i just like movies with meaning.
so today was strange. i woke up this morning and just noticed, being vegan for a month is making me VEGAN ! hahah. it sounds strange, but let me attempt to explain. i woke up this morning and i didn't think at all about what to eat or checking labels. everything just kind of happened, hence, i'm used to being vegan. it's nailed into my brain a tad now. i know come tuesday i'll be back to normal, but i think i'll definitely be returning to veganism next year, or maybe even again this year. my love of silk soy milk continues to grow with every bowl of cereal. the only bad thing is, i've been eating way too much peanut butter ! hehe. i've gotten to the point where i've just been eating teaspoons of peanut butter. i love it so, but alas, it's a love that must end soon ! today, overall, was okay. i'm probably going to go get a nice cup of apple juice or two and then go watch winter passing or blade runner. (:
so today was strange. i woke up this morning and just noticed, being vegan for a month is making me VEGAN ! hahah. it sounds strange, but let me attempt to explain. i woke up this morning and i didn't think at all about what to eat or checking labels. everything just kind of happened, hence, i'm used to being vegan. it's nailed into my brain a tad now. i know come tuesday i'll be back to normal, but i think i'll definitely be returning to veganism next year, or maybe even again this year. my love of silk soy milk continues to grow with every bowl of cereal. the only bad thing is, i've been eating way too much peanut butter ! hehe. i've gotten to the point where i've just been eating teaspoons of peanut butter. i love it so, but alas, it's a love that must end soon ! today, overall, was okay. i'm probably going to go get a nice cup of apple juice or two and then go watch winter passing or blade runner. (:
<--black-white scarf, $12. now available in my etsy shop. today was not great at all. i really didn't like it much. i guess it had its moments, but right now i really don't like it. i seemed okay, but i'm sort of dying inside, or maybe just trying to. i'm not sure how i feel. i'm either confused or content for real. right now i feel completely fine, but i don't think i'm supposed to. i don't know if that's really how i feel or not. there is just a lot going on, kind of.
i brought my old school polaroid into school today. i took three pictures. i don't scan my polaroids anymore, but it was pretty much the highlight of the day. i'm not sure how i feel exactly. school was alright, but something felt sort of empty. i feel like i'm missing something i suppose. media art honor society was canceled, so there was that. sometimes i feel as though i look forward to it, but most days, i really don't. i guess that's cos it's only fun sometimes, not all the time. i hate when things are fickle and you never know which way they'll go. i guess basically, things haven't been going so well at home. today i was instant messaging my older sister who my parents have a pointless grudge against. she said something that really hit me close to home. 'i'm tired of fighting for a family who only cares about money.' and i thought about it for a moment, and realized it was true. not only for our family, but for most families, most of the world. i've discovered my hate for the fact that everything is about money nowadays. not that i don't like having money, i'm not one to say that our monetary system is terrible i suppose, but i think there is a lack of morals in the world today. i think money has become life to a lot of people in the world, and it shouldn't be. another reason why i love my goal list, because it's about living LIFE, not living money. money is not life, life is life. nature is life. beauty is life. experience is life. i want to experience. be extraordinary. i hope i already am.
i found rainbow colored yarn in my yarn drawer today. i'm knitting something. i love when i don't know what i'm doing. i love how i surprise myself in my knits. i start something and it ends beautifully, and then is enjoyed by someone else. i want to be more than ordinary. i don't know why i do some of the things i do, but i do know this, i want to make a difference in the world. actually, i shouldn't say that. i will make a difference in the world.
i brought my old school polaroid into school today. i took three pictures. i don't scan my polaroids anymore, but it was pretty much the highlight of the day. i'm not sure how i feel exactly. school was alright, but something felt sort of empty. i feel like i'm missing something i suppose. media art honor society was canceled, so there was that. sometimes i feel as though i look forward to it, but most days, i really don't. i guess that's cos it's only fun sometimes, not all the time. i hate when things are fickle and you never know which way they'll go. i guess basically, things haven't been going so well at home. today i was instant messaging my older sister who my parents have a pointless grudge against. she said something that really hit me close to home. 'i'm tired of fighting for a family who only cares about money.' and i thought about it for a moment, and realized it was true. not only for our family, but for most families, most of the world. i've discovered my hate for the fact that everything is about money nowadays. not that i don't like having money, i'm not one to say that our monetary system is terrible i suppose, but i think there is a lack of morals in the world today. i think money has become life to a lot of people in the world, and it shouldn't be. another reason why i love my goal list, because it's about living LIFE, not living money. money is not life, life is life. nature is life. beauty is life. experience is life. i want to experience. be extraordinary. i hope i already am.
i found rainbow colored yarn in my yarn drawer today. i'm knitting something. i love when i don't know what i'm doing. i love how i surprise myself in my knits. i start something and it ends beautifully, and then is enjoyed by someone else. i want to be more than ordinary. i don't know why i do some of the things i do, but i do know this, i want to make a difference in the world. actually, i shouldn't say that. i will make a difference in the world.
today was pretty boring. i didn't like it that much. i woke up feeling crappy and then ended feeling relatively crappy. i don't know, i guess it's just raging hormones or something of the sort. i need to watch some sort of movie tonight, but i'll probably end up watching that new show on TLC, 'i can make you thin.' hahah. i love that kind of crap. i love a lot of things on TLC in general. i watch jon & kate plus 8, trading space, LA ink, what not to wear and a lot of the shows they play on that.
right now i have the basic problem of needing to study for my exams tomorrow, but being terribly preoccupied with everything else on my mind. last night i knit a cell phone case with the black and white yarn i've come to love so dearly. i think i'm going to used the rest for a scarf of some sort, but i don't know how much use it would be with such little of it left. i've been kind of undecided about a lot of things lately. i feel as though i haven't been applying myself in school, or anything else for that matter. today was pretty much a climactic moment in my veganism, where i almost broke it. just cos we went to a restaurant and i couldn't eat anything. it made my sister upset, and it made me feel really crappy. being vegan is such a commitment, but what i've found in it, has been that dairy products don't do much harm to the environment as meat does. dairy seems okay to me now, but meat still doesn't sink in. i think i will eventually become a vegetarian, but dairy, i think will stay. i'm contemplating, still, on whether or not this will become an annual ritual.
right now i have the basic problem of needing to study for my exams tomorrow, but being terribly preoccupied with everything else on my mind. last night i knit a cell phone case with the black and white yarn i've come to love so dearly. i think i'm going to used the rest for a scarf of some sort, but i don't know how much use it would be with such little of it left. i've been kind of undecided about a lot of things lately. i feel as though i haven't been applying myself in school, or anything else for that matter. today was pretty much a climactic moment in my veganism, where i almost broke it. just cos we went to a restaurant and i couldn't eat anything. it made my sister upset, and it made me feel really crappy. being vegan is such a commitment, but what i've found in it, has been that dairy products don't do much harm to the environment as meat does. dairy seems okay to me now, but meat still doesn't sink in. i think i will eventually become a vegetarian, but dairy, i think will stay. i'm contemplating, still, on whether or not this will become an annual ritual.
today i noticed how little i've been writing as of late. i guess i was pretty busy this week. next week will probably be pretty tight too, which sucks. i'm shipping a big package on monday. it has 5 squees inside. it was a $33 purchase and was made thursday. i came home from my field trip and almost died of pure happiness. i love when those big orders come along and bite you in the face, in a good way. i'm just not sure of what to do with my money. i'm kind of torn between spend or save. usually i just immediately know what to do, but it's not the case this time for some twisted reason. i guess i'm actually thinking now. i don't know if that's better or worse. oh well.
i've gotten back into the knitting habit now. last night i watched this excellent film called 'City of God.' it was in portugese and it was impeccably done. the precision and artistic vision that went into that film was extraordinary. it seemed nothing short of revolutionary to me. the way the cameras seemed to move and a storyline that i had never really thought about. parts of it disturbed me, but i thought it was an amazing film. what drew me to it was its high place on imdb's top 250, as picked by all the members. it basically brought me new insight on what kind of movies the general public likes, rather than the american film institute's list which is simply critics, actors, directors, etc. i have three other films in my room waiting to be watched though. sophie's choice, v for vendetta and who's afraid of virginia woolf? have been staring at me from my dresser for two days. i have yet to decide what order i'm going to watch them in. i still haven't seen the two films that i got for christmas, which are chung king express and the big lebowski. i guess i've been watching less films lately, but i don't feel as pressured to watch films constantly anymore, just cos the first list is over. i don't know if it's a good or bad change anymore. but right now all i feel like doing is knitting, making something, anything.
i've gotten back into the knitting habit now. last night i watched this excellent film called 'City of God.' it was in portugese and it was impeccably done. the precision and artistic vision that went into that film was extraordinary. it seemed nothing short of revolutionary to me. the way the cameras seemed to move and a storyline that i had never really thought about. parts of it disturbed me, but i thought it was an amazing film. what drew me to it was its high place on imdb's top 250, as picked by all the members. it basically brought me new insight on what kind of movies the general public likes, rather than the american film institute's list which is simply critics, actors, directors, etc. i have three other films in my room waiting to be watched though. sophie's choice, v for vendetta and who's afraid of virginia woolf? have been staring at me from my dresser for two days. i have yet to decide what order i'm going to watch them in. i still haven't seen the two films that i got for christmas, which are chung king express and the big lebowski. i guess i've been watching less films lately, but i don't feel as pressured to watch films constantly anymore, just cos the first list is over. i don't know if it's a good or bad change anymore. but right now all i feel like doing is knitting, making something, anything.
<-- all squees on sale at my etsy shop ! second day vegan, not terrible. i ate cereal with soy milk, also, not terrible, for breakfast. for lunch i had a boca burger, without cheese -____- and some wheat thins with peanut butter. the whole thing is going surprisingly well and i'm becoming so confident in my ability to do this ! i finally feel like i have willpower and at times, i'm completely turned off to the idea of real meat or desserts or whatever. we were near the cheesecake factory today, and usually, my mouth would be totally watering, but today it wasn't, and i was proud of myself. i'm not expecting to lose any weight with all of this, but a little less wouldn't hurt? hehe. first day of spring i'm planning on beginning one of my other goals that has been sitting in the back of my mind for years but i've never ever attempted to put into action cos i'm a complete ass: exercise daily. i completely dread this goal and wish i hadn't put it on the list, but if i have the willpower to be vegan, why not add exercise there too? this is really making me more confident and i've been loving every second of it. now i'm strongly leaning towards becoming a vegetarian. it's a different feeling, being vegan. you're not eating anything that was an animal, you're eating fruits and vegetables. i feel looser, not as uptight. i like the feeling i'm getting, and want it to stay. i hope it does.
today was just basically, bland. i went to the mall, knitted a little. came up with new ideas. i can't wait for my check to come this week. a new idea bloomed in me, and i want it to be put into action as soon as possible. i want and need to upgrade my skills in absolutely everything i do. i've been feeling a lot better about myself today. i hope it stays. all this talk of having willpower is making me believe i really do have some. the guts ! it's extraordinary. i haven't felt this confident in a long time. the ability to change ! the ability to be better. now this week i want to try to be nice, complain less and not yell. these goals are changing my life... but aren't they supposed to? hehe. i love every second of this being vegan so far. every second is a treasure. speaking of treasure, fuck ! i need to get a treasury. well, i guess i'll stop here then. so far though, veganism= love.
today was just basically, bland. i went to the mall, knitted a little. came up with new ideas. i can't wait for my check to come this week. a new idea bloomed in me, and i want it to be put into action as soon as possible. i want and need to upgrade my skills in absolutely everything i do. i've been feeling a lot better about myself today. i hope it stays. all this talk of having willpower is making me believe i really do have some. the guts ! it's extraordinary. i haven't felt this confident in a long time. the ability to change ! the ability to be better. now this week i want to try to be nice, complain less and not yell. these goals are changing my life... but aren't they supposed to? hehe. i love every second of this being vegan so far. every second is a treasure. speaking of treasure, fuck ! i need to get a treasury. well, i guess i'll stop here then. so far though, veganism= love.
